Throughout the ages, it has been the subject of countless artistic expressions. Musicians have written songs about it, artists have tried to visually recreate it, and filmmakers have attempted to tantalize us with it. But even though we may get caught up in the evocative melodies, lose our breath over the beauty of a painting, or dream alongside our favorite Hollywood stars, no human expression of God’s greatest gift comes close to revealing its true nature.
Love. It is the first fruit of the Holy Spirit Paul lists in Galatians 5:22-23, and for good reason. It is the very nature of who God is (1 John 4:8, 16). It is not some trite romantic expression or even just a word of feeling. Love, God-style, involves action and a heart committed, first and foremost, to knowing and becoming more like Him.
Before we learn about love, it is worth pointing out Galatians 5:22-23 identifies what the fruit of the Spirit is, not the fruits. In effect, the passage speaks of one kind of fruit with nine different qualities. God, through His Holy Spirit, is developing a fruit in His children which has the characteristics of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. The fruit of the Spirit is the supernatural outcome of being filled with the Spirit and the living proof that the Spirit of God dwells in us.
As we look at the first quality, let’s ask God to open our hearts to love like He does.
Three Types of Love
The English language, for all its utility, doesn’t always do justice to Scripture, which was originally written in various languages. The New Testament primarily was written in Greek, and unfortunately, the single English word “love” does not fully capture the three different Greek words for love, each carrying a different meaning.
The first Greek word for love is eros, which is generally associated with the sexual love between a man and a woman. In Greek mythology, eros was taken from the Greek belief in a “god” of love called by the same name. The word actually means “longing and desire.” Eros is selfish love; it asks “what can I get for myself?” Knowing this, we can understand how eros came to be associated with sexual love. Unless it is redeemed by the presence of God, sexual love becomes possessive. It can be a destructive force, which was never God’s intention. He created the physical attraction between a woman and a man, but He did not intend selfish eros.
The second Greek word for love is philos, a term usually defined as “the love one has toward a friend or companion.” 1 Peter 3:8 describes philos as “brotherly love” (hence, the name of the city Philadelphia means “city of brotherly love”). Scripture uses this word in several places to show how a friend places another in a high personal position (Luke 14:10) and shares another’s joys and sorrows (Luke 15:8-9). Unfortunately, philos, while it can be a tremendous gift, also has its failures. Friends can betray one another (Luke 21:16). Philos is also applied to “love” of things. In 1 Timothy 6:10, philos describes the “love of money.”
Obviously, neither eros nor philos is perfect enough to describe the love God has for us and the love He desires us to have for one another. That kind of love, agape, can only be expressed through us by our submission to and empowerment by the Holy Spirit.
Agape
“The fruit of the Spirit is agape…” I love what Beth Moore writes about agape in her book Living Beyond Yourself: “This divine love stands in a class all its own. In contrast to philos, agape is not a feeling or relationship based on common interests. Agape is propelled by the highest interest….Agape always flows from what is right and best. Agape is not as much a feeling as it is a response. We will discover that God commands us to agape. He is not commanding us toward a feeling. He is commanding us to surrender to an act of His Spirit which results in obedience. Emotion may accompany agape, but emotion and agape are not the same. Agape is not fueled by the desire of its recipient; it is fueled by the need.”
One of the best expressions of agape is found in 1 Corinthians 13:
If I speak in tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. (1 Cor. 13:1-8)
This passage, one of the most beautiful expressions of love ever written, is oft-quoted, with particular emphasis on verses 4-8. But notice how Paul sets up his definition of love: he dismisses the words and actions of individuals who speak and act and give without love as “nothing.” Wow. How easily we fall into the trap of making a show of our “love” for others when, in reality, unless it is born through the expression of God’s love by the Spirit, our words/actions are essentially meaningless.
OK, I don’t know about you, but when I read through the definition of love given in 1 Corinthians 13 I feel overwhelmed. There seems to be no way that I can love like that. And in my own power, I can’t. Because first and foremost, agape love is divine love. It is love borne entirely of God and the kind of love He demonstrated to us by sending Jesus to die for our sins. John 3:16 says “For God so [agape] the world that He gave us His only begotten son.”
1 John 4, the other “love” chapter in the New Testament, expresses God’s agape this way:
Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. This is how God showed His love among us: He sent His one and only Son into the world that we might live through Him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and His love is made complete in us.
We know that we live in Him and He in us, because He has given us of His Spirit. And we have seen and testify that the Father has sent His Son to be the Savior of the world. If anyone acknowledges that Jesus is the Son of God, God lives in him and he in God. And so we know and rely on the love God has for us.
God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him. In this way, love Is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment, because in this world we are like Him. There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears it not made perfect in love.
We love because He first loved us. If anyone says “I love God,” yet hates his brother, he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen. And He has given us this command: Whoever loves God must also love his brother. (1 John 4:7-21)
As humans, we are incapable of agape. No matter how hard we try, we cannot exercise this kind of love in our own power. We cannot love the unlovely or those who do not love us. Agape originates in the heart of God. Agape is the love of God expressed through us to others.
Did you catch that? God expresses His agape through us to others. And agape is more about responding than feeling. Generally, we confront a situation in which God requires us to agape another person. The best way to love that person is to (1) admit we do not have that perfect agape love on our own; (2) consider how God would personally respond to the individual according to the Scriptures; and (3) act in obedience and respond as God would. That is agape – we don’t have the capacity to love as God does on our own, but thankfully, He can use us to express His love to others if we surrender to the Holy Spirit’s leadership and empowerment.
Challenge
I don’t think there are any of us who “have it all figured out.” We can always love God more and love others more. Scripture abounds with expressions of God’s love and shows us that true agape love is demonstrative, sacrificing, and born out of God’s own heart. As we pursue Him and allow Him to change us from the inside out, we will be instruments of His love in our broken and needy world. Isn’t that encouraging? I leave you with another Beth Moore quote just because I love how she puts it:
“Oh Beloved, we have been so deceived. True love is not at all blind. When we are vessels of agape, our spiritual eyes will be open like never before, because only true love can really see…right into the heart of God.”
And now these three remain: faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love. (1 Cor. 13:13)
Thanks Sarah - I really enjoyed this post. It’s encouraging to remember that God allows His agape love to flow through us as we seek Him. As you said, He changes us from the “inside out”.
Leslie
September 19th, 2007